Colonoscopy - Stage 1, as I know you want to know.

You do right? I mean, it is scheduled for 7:45 am tomorrow. You want to feel my pain right?

5:00 pm

You are told to take 2 pills to 'soften you up'.

6:00 pm

You are then to mix some super-turbo laxative with 64 oz of Gatorade and drink in 20 minute intervals. This is similar to combination of Rotor-Rooter and Plumber's Helper.

By 6:20 pm the floodgates open. As I type this post, it is 7:18 pm and I have been to the bathroom 5 times (making it every time - just!), worked my way through 2 toilet rolls - 2 ply only and have had to leave this computer 3 times.

A wise person told me "Never, EVER, trust a fart!"

I am listening.

*runs AGAIN to the loo*

Tomorrow, the Valium, the instrument and the dreamy post I write.